Introduction

At Lola’s House, one of the very first lessons we share with new puppy owners is simple — but powerful: excitement doesn’t equal happiness. It’s a common misunderstanding. When a puppy jumps, spins, barks or wriggles uncontrollably, it’s often labelled as “being so happy!” But what we know from years of experience is that excitement is not happiness — it’s simply psychological arousal. Arousal is a natural state in which the body and mind are heightened — but high arousal can just as easily come from stress, frustration, or overwhelm as it can from joy. True happiness, the type that lasts a lifetime, is found not in moments of wild excitement, but in the calm confidence of a well-adjusted dog.

Why Excitement Isn’t the Same as Happiness

It’s very easy to mistake excitement for happiness — after all, an excited puppy looks lively and enthusiastic. But biologically speaking, excitement is a state of heightened arousal. The heart beats faster, adrenaline is released, muscles tense, and the brain switches into a more reactive mode. This is the same physiological response whether the trigger is positive (e.g., greeting a favourite person) or negative (e.g., fear of a loud noise). Arousal is arousal — and a highly aroused dog is not necessarily a happy or content one.

When we allow puppies to remain in a cycle of high arousal, it can lead to:

• Poor impulse control
• Difficulty calming down after stimulation
• Heightened sensitivity to new experiences
• Reactivity towards people, dogs, or objects
• Increased frustration and barking
• Struggles with focus during training

How Psychological Arousal Impacts Behaviour

Understanding arousal is key to understanding your puppy’s behaviour. When a puppy is highly aroused, their ability to make good choices diminishes. Think of it like trying to reason with someone in the middle of an adrenaline rush — it’s almost impossible.

In states of high arousal, puppies may:

• Ignore known cues (like “sit” or “wait”)
• Jump, mouth, or bark excessively
• Struggle to focus on you
• Become reactive to other dogs or people

Left unchecked, these behaviours often become habitual. What begins as harmless puppy excitement can transform over months into frustration-driven behaviours that are far harder to unwind. This isn’t because they are being naughty — it’s because their brain is operating in a survival mode, not a thoughtful, responsive one. At Lola’s House, we teach that calmness is the platform from which good decisions are made. Without calmness, effective training, learning, and socialisation simply cannot happen in a meaningful way.

Practical Ways to Support Calmness at Home

Helping your puppy build calmness doesn’t require complicated techniques — it’s about consistency, awareness, and setting the tone yourself.

Here are some practical steps you can begin straight away:

    1. Reward Calmness Proactively - Look for moments when your puppy is naturally calm — lying down quietly, chewing gently, sitting patiently. Reward these moments with calm praise or a treat. By reinforcing calmness, you teach your puppy that serenity is valuable.

    2. Manage Greetings Carefully - When you return home, stay relaxed. Avoid high-pitched voices or overly animated greetings. Wait until your puppy is showing calmer behaviour — such as four paws on the floor — before giving attention.

    3. Structure Play Wisely - While energetic play is important, keep it structured and manageable. Encourage games that allow for thinking and problem-solving, such as gentle tug games with clear rules, food puzzle toys, or slow sniffing activities.

    4. Teach a Settle or Bed Cue Early - Teaching your puppy to “settle” on a designated mat or bed is invaluable. It gives them a clear way to access calmness, even in stimulating environments.

    5. Model Calmness Yourself - Puppies look to us for emotional guidance. By moving, speaking, and responding calmly, you help your puppy regulate their own arousal levels more effectively.

Our Approach at Lola’s House

Our ethos at Lola’s House is centred around building calm, happy, confident dogs from the ground up.
The Puppy Programme has been designed to nurture emotional regulation alongside socialisation, basic training, and nutrition. We believe that a puppy’s emotional wellbeing matters just as much as their physical health — and that giving puppies the skills to remain calm and composed in different environments sets them up for success far beyond their early months.

Excitement has its place, and we love seeing puppies enjoy themselves — but excitement alone is not a measure of happiness. A well-socialised, emotionally balanced, calm dog is a truly happy dog.

This is just one of the first lessons we cover in our Puppy Programme — and it lays the foundation for everything that follows.